I read yesterday about a case which started a couple of years back, rearing it's head again. At first glance, due to the bombardment of one-sided misinformation on various well meaning websites, it looks like a sad case of (and I quote) "a loving family being torn apart" due to unreasonable and incompetent Swedish authorities. That presumption annoyed me at the time, and it annoys me even more now. It took all of about 30 minutes of Google to get to the bottom of the reality of the situation. The supporters may not like the truth, but here's what really went down (with a touch of artistic license):
Hey, Svensson, it's the local school board here.
Hey yourself, nice of you to call.
All in the name of service. Anyway, I was ringing about your son.
Nils ? Top kid.
Wouldn't know about that. In fact, that's why I'm ringing.
How so ?
Nils hasn't come to school.
Today ?
Any day, actually.
Well, he's just a baby. Can't rush these things.
He's 8 years old, Svensson.
Serious ? Boy, doesn't time fly.
Planning on sending him to school, Svenny ?
Hadn't really thought about it. My wife has this cultural thingy.
What sort of thingy ?
She reckons 8 year olds should be at home being hugged all day.
You been sniffing those fumes again, Svenns ?
Nope, straight up. No school for our Nils.
Doesn't quite work that way.
You sure ?
Pretty sure. Now get your hippy arse out the door and get your kid to school.
What if we don't want to ?
Then we'll take him to school ourselves and you likely get a smack around the head.
Bugger. Well, in that case, we'll... we'll .... we'll...
You'll what ?
We'll homeschool him ! Ha Ha! Didn't see that one coming, did you ?
Fair cop. Ok, send in the application form and we'll have a look at it.
What do you mean application form ? I've decided that we're home schooling him.
Since when ?
Since I just thought of it now.
What if you're really crappy teachers ?
Why would you say that ?
Because I haven't seen your application form yet.
Ok, best I send one in then.
Best you do. In the mean time, get Nils on that school bus.
Sorry, didn't catch that last part. Must be a poor connection.
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Hey there, Svensson. It's your old pal from the school board here again.
Long time, no see. How's tricks ?
Mustn't grumble. How's Nils enjoying school ?
What you talkin about ? Nils is being home schooled, remember ?
Serious ?
Dead. Sent the application form away and everything.
Yup, got that form right here in front of me. Appreciated the scented stationery.
Anything to help. Was there something else ?
Kind of. Your application to homeschool has been refused.
Sorry ?
Yeah, you know that joke the other week about you both being crap teachers ?
Sure do. Cracked me up no end.
Me too. Funny thing was though, it turned out to be no joke.
For real ?
Yup, you're both rubbish.
Gee, I was kind of hoping for a better score than that.
We all were, Svensson.
What was the biggest problem, if I can ask ?
Certainly. Your wife was to be doing the schooling herself, correct ?
That's right. Bless her. One of us has to go out and work you know.
I quite understand. Your wife has quite an unusual first name.
That would be because she's Indian.
That would explain that. So, tell me, how do you two manage to communicate ?
No problem there. She's a frickin genius. Speaks English better than the Raj himself.
So you speak English then. Why don't you speak Swedish ?
That would be pretty stupid.
How so ?
Because my wife doesn't speak Swedish.
Not at all ?
Not so much as a Tack.
Ah. So you all speak English.
Yuppers.
So....., how is your Swedish born son going to learn Swedish ?
Why would he want to do that ?
Because he's living in Sweden.
Well, technically, yes. But we're all going to bugger off to India one day.
And ?
Well not many people speak Swedish there. Waste of time really.
But you're living in Sweden today, right ?
That's what the return address on the envelope says.
Then the law says that Swedish children have to be able to learn Swedish.
What a bollocks law.
Quite possibly, but still the law. Now get him off the Playstation and get him to school.
Sheesh, there's that bad connection again. Gotta go.
Shortly after being ordered to send their child to school, the family were nabbed trying to flee the country via a secondary airport. The child, as a Swedish citizen, was taken in to care by the Swedish authorities who quite rightly determined that he was being denied basic social and educational development rights under Swedish law.
Now, instead of this being a simple "you knowingly and willingly broke the law of the land", the manic support brigade have tried to turn this into a crusade about Swedish attitudes towards home schooling. The truth is that it never had anything to do with home schooling, and everything to do with obeying the law. The question of home schooling was never even raised until after the parents had been caught and threatened with prosecution for not sending their child to school. They simply introduced the notion of home school later on in order to weasel their way out of a justly deserved conviction. Had the authorities not been made aware of the situation, the child would have been receiving zero education today. But he would have been well hugged.
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